January 29-30, 2005, Romans 12:15, selected

BETTER TOGETHER - 40 DAYS OF COMMUNITY
BELONGING BETTER TOGETHER!

(What BREAKS Relationships & What Builds Them!)

***Romans 12:5 “In the same way, even though we are many individuals, Christ makes us one body and individuals who are connected to each other.”
[God’s Word for the Nations]
*** Phil. 4:2 “And now I want to plead with those two women, Euodia and Syntyche. Please, because you belong to the Lord, settle your disagreement.” [NLT]

HOW RELATIONSHIPS CAN STUMBLE OR SUCCEED?

1. SELFISHNESS BREAKS RELATIONSHIPS…
*** James 4:1-2a “What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don't they come from your desires that battle within you? You want something but don't get it. You…covet, but you cannot have what you want. You quarrel and fight.” [NIV]

A. IT’S NATURAL!
*** Eph. 2:3a “In the past all of us lived like them, trying to please our sinful selves and doing all the things our bodies and minds wanted.” [New Century Version]

B. IT’S CULTURAL!
*** Phil. 2:21 “The others think only about what interests them and not about what concerns Christ Jesus.” [Contemporary English Version]
*** Proverbs 28:25a “Selfishness only causes trouble.” [Today’s English Version]

… SELFLESSNESS BUILDS RELATIONSHIPS!
*** Phil. 2:4 “And look out for one another's interests, not just for your own.” [TEV]
*** 1 Cor. 10:24 “Do not look out only for yourselves. Look out for the good of others also.” [NCV]

2. PRIDE BREAKS RELATIONSHIPS…
*** Proverbs 13:10 “Pride leads to arguments….” [New Living Translation]

YOU MIGHT HAVE A PRIDE PROBLEM IF:
A. YOU ARE CONSTANTLY CRITICAL!
B. YOU TEND TO BE COMPETITIVE AND COMPARING!
C. YOU CHOKE ON APOLOGIES!
D. YOUR RELATIONSHIPS ARE SHALLOW AND SUPERFICIAL!

*** Pr. 16:18 “Pride will destroy a person; a proud attitude leads to ruin.” [NCV]
*** Pr. 16:18 “First pride, then the crash—the bigger the ego, the harder the fall.”
[Message Bible]

… HUMILITY BUILDS RELATIONSHIPS!
*** Phil. 2:3 “…Do not let selfishness or pride be your guide. Instead, be humble and give more honor to others than to yourselves.” [NCV]
*** 1 Peter 3:8 “Finally, all of you, live in harmony with one another; be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble.” [New International Version]

HARMONY AND HUMILITY GO TOGETHER!
*** Eph. 4:23-24a “Let the Spirit change your way of thinking and make you into a new person.” [CEV]

3. INSECURITY BREAKS RELATIONSHIPS…
*** Pr. 29:25 “It is dangerous to be concerned with what others think of you, but if you trust the Lord, you are safe.” [TEV]

INSECURITY MANIFESTS ITSELF:
A. IN FEAR OF EXPOSURE!
*** Genesis 3:10 “Adam replied, "I heard you, so I hid. I was afraid because I was naked." [NLT]

IF WE CAN’T BE REAL IN RELATIONSHIPS
WE CAN’T HAVE REAL RELATIONSHIPS!

B. IN FEAR OF REJECTION!

DON’T LET SOMEONE’S HURT - HURT YOU ANYMORE!

… LOVE BUILDS RELATIONSHIPS!
*** 1 John 4:18a “There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear….” [NIV]

LIVE YOUR LIFE FOR AN AUDIENC OF ONE!

4. RESENTMENT BREAKS RELATIONSHIPS…
*** Job 5:2 “To worry yourself to death with resentment would be a foolish, senseless thing to do.” [TEV]

WILL THAT HURT MAKE ME A BITTER OR BETTER PERSON?

*** Hebrews 12:15 “Make sure that everyone has kindness from God so that bitterness doesn't take root and grow up to cause trouble….” [GW]

OPPOSITES TEND TO ATTRACT AND LATER, ATTACK!

*** Psalm 73:21-22a “Then I realized how bitter I had become…. I was so foolish and ignorant….” [NLT]

… FORGIVENESS BUILDS RELATIONSHIPS!
*** Col. 3:13 “You must make allowance for each other's faults and forgive the person who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.” [NLT]

FORGIVENESS IS NOT:

FORGIVENESS IS LETTING GO OF THE PAIN AND THE RIGHT TO GET EVEN!

“Forget what happened in the past, and do not dwell on events from long ago. I am going to do something new. It is already happening. Don't you recognize it? I will clear a way in the desert. I will make rivers on dry land.” Isaiah 43:18-19 [GW]